I have coined a new phrase to describe mental and emotional inertia: The Quagmire Excuse. Born of the confusion of September 11th 2001, the term has since then come to resemble Dadaist Art describing a state of mind that attempts to pass itself off as a genuine metaphysic but in fact is pure syncretism.
I have been highly upset yesterday and last night for some reason. I just totally have felt traumatized. Very upset. I don’t know why and to make it more distressing, I am plagued by oppressive thoughts. It’s not like I am totally down on myself but I definitely don’t feel like my mind is free to think and be at the same time and that really is bothering me. I wouldn’t wish this feeling on anyone. And for some reason, I totally don’t want to talk about it really. I am feeling superstitious, as if voicing my discontent will somehow make it grow and manifest like kudzu that can’t be controlled. I have only felt this way for a few days and yesterday was the worst. Going to wait another week and see if the feeling passes and clears. It may just be a mood thing, and I have been forgetting to take my anti depressants for the past two weeks, so that doesn’t help.